Getting my head right.

I’ve been fighting a persistent mind weasel, and I wanted to share about it. This mind weasel is one that I think we all have: self demoralization.

I’ve been trying to get myself to start running, but this weasel is holding me back. It says that if I start working out now it’ll just look like I’m trying to copy everyone else that’s working (and succeeding) on getting into shape. It says that I am too far behind to catch up to them. It says that I will always be the fat friend, and the winded friend, and the one that would rather play board games than go for a walk. It says that it’s too hard to get back to where I was, so why would I even start. It says I’ll never actually complete this either, just like all of the millions of other things I’ve started and not finished (shut up, crochet basket).

The negativity, if allowed to go unchecked, is debilitating. Some bit of me just cowers in the corner, finds a way to be too busy, or just gets hostile. I’m hostile with myself, and with anyone who asks me about my working out. I’m angry that my body doesn’t just work right. IT doesn’t just handle itself. It doesn’t just… do what I want it to do.

The problems REALLY start when I allow this negativity to seep into other parts of my life. It tries often, and succeeds more often than I’d like to admit. About 2 years ago I was diagnosed with ADHD. Violent mood-swings are a huge part of my ADHD, along with bouts of depression. Treating it has been… life changing.

A few months before the wedding my drug-doctor (psychiatrist) told me to add vitamin D3 to my daily regimen, because he suspected I was low, and folic acid. I kinda did, but mostly didn’t remember to take it. After the wedding I found blood-work results that had arrived in the flurry of pre-wedding-action, which revealed he was right. Very right.

It wasn’t until about a month ago that I started really taking all of the supplements like he’d suggested, and the difference is remarkable. I’m more productive, and more stable. I’m combating the mind weasels easier with each day. Most importantly: I’m happier.

Vitamin D deficiency is a super common thing, especially in the midwest. It’s also starting to be linked to all KINDS of other diseases. While I don’t think VitaminD is any kind of miracle, I do see it helping me a whole lot. If you’ve got ADHD and your meds aren’t covering all of your problems, ask your doctor to test you for vitamin deficiencies. It’s meant all the difference to me.